One of the many things God did at training camp was begin to shift my perspective. What does it really mean to be the Body of Christ? To answer this question He has begun to transform my faith walk marked by individuality to a faith walk marked by community.
Allow me to explain…
To start, I left training camp in a very different headspace than when I started. One thing you may know about me is that I am personally accustomed to doing Kingdom work on my own. I like to spend time with God, so that I can therefore pour into others, but I struggle to find rest for myself. I have found that my lifestyle is lacking both family and intimacy, both with my Creator and my community. I have found that I desire a community that is not simply people surrounding me, but a family that has an active say in my life. I no longer want it to just be me taking on the world with God, consulting others as I wish, but me living life alongside believers and letting them speak into what I do.
I have realized that I have built a wall of protection. Doing ministry alone means that I am still able to exercise control, doing what I want to do in the way I want to do it, and able to pride myself because I don’t have to share roles. You see, working as a body means delegation and compromise. It means accepting that another person may be a better fit for a role than you are.
At training camp it did not take time for me to realize that I wasn’t the group leader I thought I was. Other people were better at gathering up the crew, delegating tasks, and navigating logistics. I was humbled, and I couldn’t help but ask, “What is my role here?”. In this case my question was problematic because, whether I knew it or not, my identity was tied to what I accomplished for God. Yes, God wants us to partner with Him in His Kingdom work, but God is not using us as pawns to accomplish his will. His will is never-changing and will happen with or without us. My purpose is to simply know Him.
Our Western society makes it so easy to drift from group to group, place to place, finding the one church that best suits us. I no longer want to be part of a culture formed by personal desire, I want to live a life as a fully functioning body. This is what Christ intended believers to be. Though it is challenging to live this out in a fallen world, it is a beautiful opportunity that I have ignored for way too long. I am ready to commit to my team members, ready to commit to mutual intimacy, ready to commit to God.
I urge you brothers and sisters, don’t walk this faith journey on your own.
